As a life-long (but mostly reformed) people pleaser, boundaries are the most uncomfortable thing I’ve had to learn while building my business.
I used to tell clients I could deliver projects THE NEXT DAY 😂. It was completely unrealistic, and I rarely hit those impossible deadlines I’d created for myself. Consulting as a people pleaser can be maddening. I know exactly what to do to make people happy, but if not handled well it can be incredibly draining.
When your paycheck depends on keeping customers/clients happy, saying ‘no’ is really hard. What if they think I’m being difficult? What if they fire me? What if they don’t pay the open invoice? [Please note that in over 12 years of consulting, none of these things have ever happened. Not once.
Every time you bend your boundaries to please a client, you’re training them that your limits don’t actually exist. The solution is to set crystal-clear expectations from day one, so that there are no surprises when you enforce boundaries mid-stream.
Here’s what boundary setting looks like:
Scenario 1
Proactively: "This project includes two rounds of revisions and will be delivered in [X days]. Additional changes can be added at [rate] with adjusted timelines."
Reactively: When a client asks for "just one more quick revision" after scope completion: "We've completed the revisions included in our original scope. Additional changes would be [fee] with a delivery date of [date]."
Scenario 2
Proactively: "Based on this scope, my realistic timeline is [X days] to ensure quality delivery. Rush options are available for an additional fee."
Reactively: When asked to "rush this by tomorrow": "I want to deliver quality work. My realistic timeline is [X days]. If you need it sooner, I can explore a rush option for an additional fee."
Yes, it may feel uncomfortable the first few times. But the more you do it, the stronger your boundary setting muscle will grow. Eventually, these conversations become second nature. Most clients respect the clarity. Some pay for additional work (hello, extra revenue). And you stop feeling resentful about your business running you.
The messy truth about entrepreneurship is that setting boundaries isn't just a business skill, it's an act of self-preservation that gets stronger with practice.
Where do you feel like your boundaries could be stronger right now? Hit reply and let me know.
Talk soon,
Carrie
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