We’ve all been there. You start to tell a story or explain something, and before you can finish, someone jumps in with their own experience or a quick solution. It’s frustrating. And it usually means they’re making assumptions about what you’re going to say, which often leads to advice or solutions that completely miss the mark.
Most people think they’re good listeners. But here’s the truth: most people are just waiting for their turn to talk. We listen to reply, not to understand. Even worse, they listen to the first part of something and then zone out as they think about their response.
Entrepreneurs are especially prone to this. The urge to jump in, to show you’ve seen this problem before or to prove you’re capable, is strong. But here’s the thing: you don’t need to prove yourself mid-conversation. You’ll prove yourself with the quality of your work, your products, and the outcomes you deliver.
That gap, between hearing words and actually understanding someone, is where friction, broken trust and missed opportunities live.
Why Listening to Understand Matters in Business
You build better things When you slow down and really hear what’s being said, the solutions you create actually fit the need.
You solve the right problem Instead of chasing symptoms, you uncover the root issue. Fixing the right thing saves time, money and energy for everyone.
Clients feel seen and valued When you listen deeply, they trust you with bigger challenges (and keep coming back).
Relationships last longer People stick with leaders who “get them.”
The 7 Steps to Listening to Understand
Here’s the process I use:
Listen: Give your full attention without planning a response.
Keep Listening: Don’t jump in, let them finish.
Pause: Silence is powerful. It gives space to the speaker.
Listen More: Often the most important insight comes after the first explanation.
Think (but not while listening): Reflect once they’re done speaking
Respond (or wait): A thoughtful pause beats a rushed answer
Thank & Follow-up: Acknowledge what they shared and clarify next steps
Put It into Practice
This week, try one simple experiment: Next time you’re in a conversation, catch yourself when you start planning your reply. Instead, lean into silence and see what comes out when you give someone a little more space. You may be surprised with how much more people share when they feel truly heard.
This is a muscle that has to be strengthened. If it feels awkward the first time, try again. I promise it becomes more natural and people get used to the rhythm.
Over to You
Want to go deeper on this? Hit reply and tell me where you need help in learning to listen at a deeper level. I’m tailoring this newsletter to be useful for YOU and I read every message that comes my way!
And, if you know another entrepreneur (heck, anyone could use this skill), forward them this email. Listening better could be the skill that changes their next client conversation.
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